My Feelings…..

haiz…now the time is 1.07 am haiz…suddeny wake up hear hazrul nizam song… KAULAH SEGALANYA…remember the days i sing for her…..*sign* what to to wondering around and looking at the moon….realli missing someone…

haiyah tomorrow i got NDP preview…haiz…damn got a duty to do…still cannot sleep…i know its hard to forget her…but really irritates me man…haiz…disturbing my duty…like people said…tak semangat nak buat keja…trying to avoid her from entering my mind…everywhee i go, everywhere i see, everywhere i stop i remember her…pls ya allah tolong la aku….

if she reading my blog pls remember me…dont u worry i will never call u…but im depending on u..and waiting for your call…no matter what…i will nvr go to other gerls…promise myself..i’ve no heart she stole my heart…she took it everything…haiz… -END-

hai guys…i know lots of people reading my blog…but its ok…i want to let people know hows life people goes….hmmm…just came back from home…and my gym try to keep my healthy life style….hehehehe reduce my ciggies…trying to think back ciggies make my money gone…make my body weak ….goin to the gym wif my friends…just workout abit only…bcoz to tired…doing my filier make me stressed sometimes…i dont know i kept thinking of her…i still try to figure out whats her fault and mine too…but i couldnt find it….

yesterday i bumbed onto one of HER friend liza(forget her name) finally people recognise me…hehehe wif my limping legs…could not walk yesterday really pain…haiz……today just read HER blog…hmmm think of it she got lots of guy friends…yah 1st stage always a good ways to treat a gerl nice…but later on u will know guys always be guys…remember the nazz…31 yrs old..hmmm thats good…go shopping here and there…get new guys number…wee weet!but i give u warning 1st ok my dear… hope she thinks of me…dont u worry my dear i wont call u until one day i will…for my goodness sake pls pick up the phone…and special gift for me to u….and pls accept it…ok..my dear..i hope u still wearing my necklace…and keep my promises…ok my dear…haiz…and i hope i will get back to u…haiz…

i think today i going to fishing!!!!!yahoo!!!HARUAN WHERE R MY FISHIE FISHIE!!!love that fish good for your skin to…hehehehetry to go shopping…next saturday…alone i think i hav no friends…or any new friends…i think of it ayid is not my gd friend…he show to the bad ways…haiz…i want my future to be bright!…OPS! i think im late!!!friday preyyers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh gosh im late…..bye guys…sembahyang lah kamu sebelom kamu di sembahyang kan! hahaha

today my life is so diffrent…whole day kept smoking my ciggiesim becoming a really heavy smoker…kept thinking of her…haiz….i know is bad of my health but what to do…i try msg her….she never reply…andnow i make my mind to not to disturb her anymore…kalau lah ada jodoh kita akan bersama lagi…haiz…try to forget about her…what ever i do i kept thinking of her no matter what….

I told my mum about this…she kept crying….bcoz of my life…she hoping that get back my worst attitude like last time….my mum were happy if i get back to her…but i told my mum that she dont wants my anymore…my mum asked me why? i dont asnwer her Question….haiz…everyday i cant sleep she look at me she cried…somemore my leg..got thorn ligament…haiz….my future is becoming darker and darker…i keep preyying….i think got is playing my life…hahah i think ni semua cobaan dan dugaan….haiz….

last few days i went to fishing caught  haruan quite alot…i caught 11 of them and big toman(SNAKEHEAD) heheh but damn forget to bring my digicam…but its ok there always a other time to take those stupid fish…hehehehe i think tomorrow i will go again….but haiz i need a rest on saturday i got NDP PREVIEW!damn kenna call back…haiz…tiring day later

i hoping feza will keep in touch with me in the future…and rhoping she still remember me…and thinking of me..i hope only….haiz….what a life…..what a miserable life….i think some people got worst life than me….but its ok…haiz…

haiz…now i know… her life she be wif me…she’s not happy haiz…and not smiling at all…pls remember about the flowers i gave it to u…to i tak kasi u smile ker?ayang….pls lah ayang…today i need someone to help me…im totally frustrated…depressed!….sad!!!but y u did this to me ayang..pls ayang…help me…i berdoa…sembahyang untuk u ayang…y nobody can help me…i cant sleep i cant eat…im so weak…even i dont eat my medicine!ayang pls…i cant i try so many times…still cannot forget about u….u are too nice to me! ayang…u stole my heart!my only heart!and now…haiz….ayang pls give me another life ayang…i betul tada org…lain…i still tak leh lupa kan u…ayang pls!!!hidup i sepi tanpa mu!hidup dalam kegelapan..i cant see anything…ini kah dugaan cobaan dari dia? YA ALLAH…BERIKAN KU SEMANGAT HIDUP BERSAMA DIA YA ALLAH….BUKA KAN HATI NYE BUKA KAN HATI SELUAS KAMU BOLEH YA ALLAH…KU SANGGUP BUAT APA SAJA UNTUK YUHAFEZA…

For few days i try not to called her…but haiz…what to do…at work got a snake hav to send to zoo or reptile park…but i suggest send to reptile park…u know y bcoz she working at the zoo as a Asst Vet….but i choose not to go to zoo…let her be herself for the moment…let her taste the single life…suddenly when back to station….got a case of dislocated leg(thats me got torn ligament.hehehe)when to hospital hav a further check up…haiz…what i day…hehehe

when back to home try to call her…she picks up…told her about my day and she told me that she going to take her degree in november or april next yr……gd luck for her…i hope she can cope on her studies and what dont expect that…she going to engage if someone masuk meminang haiz…i hope someone is me lah…, she sound very caring, manja, and miss her sweet cute voice…really miss it…thanks to her, at least for depression getting lesser….after put down the fone i kept smiling myself like im the most happiest guy in the world by the same time talk to her..i feel like im talking to a new gerl suddenly i feel soooo nervous, i dont know y i feel like that…hehehe she’s diffrence i feel something towards her…something special…really special….but i dont want to talk about getting back together or about love…try not to…lets get a new life slowly..im change im totally change…my friends tell me im losing weight but seems like looking at the mirror im not! check on my weight im lose 10kg! OMG! amazing! hehehehe i really hoping we can get back together with a newly life….thanks again for picking upthe fone…really thank you sooo much.. MUACK! miss kissing someone….hahahahaha

haiz i think i will get back to my normal life…my normal life is just so simple…really simple…chill alone only…watch my fish swimming. Try to called all my old friends..but they hav their life wif their GIRLFRIEND…but i try to call ayid..he said he will chilling with me later…i think ayid will make my life diff..i mean after i chilling wif him i will forget her..i hope so…i promise her mom that i will never disturb her…i respect her parent…but dont u all worry i will remember something that i cant forget….try to do something stupid or think before u do something….i hope we can get back together….haiz…..

LIRIK FROM A MALAY MOVIE…SOAL NYE SIAPA…1st malay movie that i really like…and memories haiz…..

Hasnol

Laguku Untukmu

Kehadiran membawa seribu erti
Terasa bagaikan suatu mimpi
Indah mahligai yang kita bina
Impian kini terlaksana sudah

Tiada ku terlintas akan terjadi
Kita kan terpisah jua akhirnya
Sejenak ku terfikir segala
Oh keindahan bersamamu

( 1 )
Kembalilah kasih kepada diriku
Hidupku sepi tanpa kehadiranmu
Dengar rayuanku jeritan batinku
Masih dahagakan kemesraanmu
Hanya kau yang ku cinta tiada kedua
Usah biar ku menderita

Setelah kau pergi tiada kembali
Pilunya tak dapat ku menggambarkan
Abadi kasihku yang amat suci
Biarku yang dalam kegelapan

Dengarlah dendangan laguku untukmu
Suara hati lambang suci murni
Berat saatku dilamun rindu
Setelah lama dikau pergi oh…
Kasihku… oh…

( 2 )
Kembalilah kasih kepada diriku
Hidupku sepi tanpa kehadiranmu
Dengar rayuanku jeritan batinku
Masih dahagakan kemesraanmu
Hanya kau yang ku cinta tiada kedua
Usah biar ku menderita

Setelah kau pergi tiada kembali
Pilunya tak dapat ku menggambarkan
Abadi kasihku yang amat suci
Biarku yang dalam kegelapan
Kasihku… oh…

according to my time is 0320am…haiz…still cant sleep…kept thinking of her…i try my best not to think of her but i cant….4 yrs with her is long…yah she told me 4 is just a number…haiz…but she change my behavior…she change me to be a good person…and now im change she leave me just like that…im under depression…no where to go…nobody to talk to..*sign*

3 days i cant eat properly….everytime i eat i dont feel like eating…no appetite…i hope i can be like other ppl…their life is soo happy…ayang….just give me chance to get my life back ayang…im diff rite now… *crying* Kurindu Wajah dan Senyumanmu

HMMM BTW…I DONT KNOW HOW TO DO OR HOW TO SAY IN THE BLOG….I BUILD THIS BLOG BCOZ OF MY FEELINGS……hmmm…tah lah eh…i dont how to speak or write english very well so understand understood lah k….hehehehe ok lah…

haiz…my heart just broke into billion pieces…..haiz….so sad…feeling sad….pasrah…heard that my ex getting engage with one of her brother in law frends….what to do life hav to go on…previously i cant cope of my life…at work im laughing happily…but in my heart and feelings so sad…my parents seldom talk to my…i got my eldest and my elder bro…also seldom talk to them…so..i only hav friends….friends come and go…haiz…what to do…life hav to go on…

i hav nuthing much to type…just feeling confused…

dikeheningan malam,
termenungku berseorang
tak lena mata dipejam
terdengar suara terngiang
suara merdu yg di sayang
bagai kau didepan mata
ku capai tapi tak kenal
sukarnya memendam rasa
ingin ku luahkan kata

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
inginkan jiwamu selubungi,jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi segala hati ini

jauh angan ku lena,ku rasa kita bersama,kau bawaku ke sana
ke alam kisah yg lama,kenangan di dlm jiwa..
bila tersedar semula,disisiku kau tiada
sukarnya ku pendam rasa,ingin ku luahkan semua ooooouuu

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku terasa sayu
inginkan jiwamu selubungi,jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi segala hati ini

sesunguhnya kita mestilah
wujudkan sefahaman dan hormatmu
hormati,ikhlas,kasih,
——————-
makin tak ada,bertemu semula

awan yg mencas semesta
menyampaikan pesan kesunyian kanda sendiri
kesepian yg menyelubungi hari hari ku
disajikan doa2 ku kerana rindu
yg menanti kau dtg dan pergi seperti mimpi2 ku,fantasiku,
bukan dongeng lagi sayup kedengaran
disisi cuping,disetiap corong,lorong,yg lohong
benar!ku tak bohong,bila hati menyanyi..

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
ooohhohhoo
aku merindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
inginkan jiwa selubungi,jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi batas

oh bila rindu,terkenang mu sayang.,ku terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
(ku rindukan sentuhanmu)inginkan jiwamu selubungi,jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi batas diri in

Setiap detik saat buat kuhiba ku melarat
Dan semakin berat terasa terjerat
Mungkin ku tidak sekuat kusangka

Setiap rintik hujan buat keadaanku tenat
Dan segala kudrat kuperah keringat
Daku dah penat melawan perasaan

Dan memang benar sebenar-benarnya
( daku terseksa )
Amat terasa sejak kau tiada

Vida
Kembalikanlah semangatku
Kembalikan ketenanganku
Kurebah tanpamu
Carino mio
Tak terdaya lagi bernafas
Jiwa daku semakin lemas
Dahagakan cintamu
Kaulah nyawaku

Katakanlah apa saja yang dikau damba
Sedaya-upaya kutunaikannya
Asal kau pulang ke dakapanku

Daku bersungguh sesungguh-sungguhnya
( tangis berdoa )
Mahu cintamu dan masa indah lalu oh…

Vida
Kembalikanlah semangatku
Kembalikan ketenanganku
Kurebah tanpamu
Carino mio
Tak terdaya lagi bernafas
Jiwa daku semakin lemas
Dahagakan cintamu
Kaulah nyawaku…
Kaulah nyawaku oh…

Vida
Kembalikanlah semangatku
Kembalikan ketenanganku
Kurebah tanpamu
Carino mio
Tak terdaya lagi bernafas
Jiwa daku semakin lemas
Dahagakan cintamu
Kaulah nyawaku

Vida
Kembalikanlah semangatku
Kembalikan ketenanganku
Kurebah tanpamu

Berikanlah daku peluang hanya sekali lagi
Senyumanmulah menjadi penawar hati
Melutut merayu… kau nyawaku

THIS LYRICS DEDICATE TO MY EX(YUHAFEZA BINTE YASIN)….AYANG I WISH ALL THE THE BEST WHAT EVER U DO….