My Feelings…..

YAHOO! at last i got to hear her voice….but i dont expect more…just few mins talk…her sweet voice…i know she regret for picking up the called…but what to do….at least i can hear her voice and her laugh…hehehe im so nervous and had a wet palm…for me if im wet palm thats mean im so excited…dont think the dirty way ok…thanks ayang for picking up the phone….

yah i dont expect anything…not more or what…my wish is come true just now…wish that i can talk to her….hehehe im so happy…im the most happiest guy in the world…hahaha i hope lah…we can keep in touch for whole life…and

u i really want u back…nobody can replace u….not even SITI NURHALIZA or who ever lah….only yourself can make me happy…only u my dear…i wish we can get back together….and change not like last time…my heart still wif u……u stole my heart….pls place it back…your heart together wif my heart….we can create a happy life….ayang pls come back…pls…

yahooo!!! yesterday go fishing….got lots of fish….but all small one lah….yesterday was tiring day danger day! hahaha nearly got bitten by a very very very big n unusual centipede….that thing crawl up till my neck!damn!!!till now i can feel it and now i became phobia wif that thing…wahlau!!!!! lucky sia…

yesterday was a rilek day wif my friend…sitting on the beach on MP3 wif speaker….was rilek man!!!!wif the wind and the sound of the waves…..really like it that way….while sitting on the beach and my friend was sleeping…i sunddenly thinking of my life…the gerl and her….y they did this to me….dah tada jodoh kata kan…..what to do….HER u know its unfair! really unfair! y must she go wif that guy! i really miss her alot…but haiz…she dont want me anymore…no matter what…but about that gerl haiz….dont know.

yeah i woke up late hahahaha yesterday slept at 0400HRS hahahah i cant sleep….thinking of something…haiz…i really sad about HER…i really need someone to talk and beside me…but nobody….yesterday slept at 0400hrs woke up at 1030hrs…hahah i hav to go to work at 7 and now…im late…fuck! they teasing me all the times…but its ok for me…not like some other ppl cannot take it as a joke…..for me its ok just a joke only…bcoz i really seldom late….i always come early….very early and take over duties also early…but sometime i very tired or sian…i will wake up late…hahahaha

haiz…i dont know what happen to me…out of sudden i hav no mood to go to fishing on this weekend…no mood….got the money..MARKSMANSHIP money but no mood to go fishing or shopping…i dont know whats wrong wif me…im sad wif my life….really sad…fuck! i hate this….

yesterday we hav family discussion about my mom stall…very good chat….very seldom we chat like this…haha sometime quite fun…planning about my eldest brother wedding coming this 10th and 11th my family ask me to invite HER but see 1st haha i dont think she might be coming…haiz…she dont want to see me or talk to me…yah…my dad want to make SATAY on my brother wedding…yeah…2000 sticks of satay…..wooooooooo 1st come 1st serve lah…hheheheheyesterday i had a good chat wif my family and sister in law….hehehe yeah…my dad confirm that we hav to downgrade…5 rooms flat to 3 rooms flat….haiz….alot of things to clear…dining table..sofa….haiz alot ah!!!!!!! haiz…gonna miss this house….haiz…what to do my dad plan…they need money…and he said after move house..he can help me about studying…he want to sponsor and driving to…but i make my mind not to use their money…hmmmm….THATS Y TODAY I WOKE UP LATE!!!!!!!!!!

today In-service….haiz tired…when to sleep at 4th floor hahaha locker room lah…hahahah yeah after the In-Service…when to tackle shop…i think i might getting new Rod And Reel….hehehee fishing so shiock ah! interested in that thing u know…my rod but hav to spend abit of money…and new Perfume…. Hugo In Motion….haahahah this month spent lots of money…pay this and that but this and that..haiyah…nvr think of future…but its ok once in awhile hav to spent what!

I Talked wif the shop owner very friendly and giv me gd price…thats good….and learn of thing from him too…fishing is my hobby…i got lots of hobby…collecting exotic animals…go fishing….see fish…and taking pictures! yeah i got plan to this sunday…go fishing take some pictures and hav fun!!! alone….haiz….no kaki leh to join me…..all bloop bloop u know what it means its bubble! say want to follow lah this want lah…at last..got something on…what to do…but i also hav to understand them…they hav their own gf…not like me…free anytime im free…but no matter what i got gf i also went to fishing…still remember i still wif HER…i went to fishing wif my friend and my bro…lucky she understand hahahahabut now im back to my own self…hahahah its ok cant wait for this sunday!!!!overnight buy some snacks…fishing and camping!!! alone…haiz…

I just came back from work….my 1st day off today and tomorrow i got in-service…damn~! im tired….haiz….yesterday i SMS that gerl…but she nvr reply me back…i dont know ithink she dont want to be my friend anymore….haiz…nvrmind life hav to go on…yeah life hav to go on….haiz….today i hav no plan dont know where to go…i might going out alone….hmmm where to go ah?hmmm jurong lakepark?hmmm sitting down alone…watching ppl see childrens playing….taking their pictures….hmmm that will be nice….

last two days…i chat wif her…seem like she really move on…but we hav a nice chat….talking about her bolster…she likes her bolster….still remember she told me that she hug her bolster like hugging me…hehe thats cute…yeah i still remember our past time…our sweet memories…inside the tent playing wif each other(don think of something ah…)hahaha taking pictures…at the beach…sometimes i think over it….it was fun…sweet couple….romantic…but what to do..now we separate and move our own life and our own way….haiz…

im still thinking what i want to do when im ORD….but my feeling still on studies… but think of it…if im studies i hav to use my parents money…i dont want that to be happen anymore…now im grown up! i hav to use my own money! im pity wif my parents…they getting older and older…and getting sick…i pity wif my mum and my dad…haiz….now i know this is life….

this weekend so boing and so lonely…no where to go dont know what to do….just make ppl angry….now i know i make ppl irritating only….haiz now onwards….i just kep quiet and sitting alone and nvr disturb ppl anymore….yah i dont know what goin on around me…yah…no body understand me…only god knows how i feel…..haiz…what wrong wif me?my chest keep on hurt me….really pain…y?i hurt myself i hurt someone feelings…haiz…

i really feeling down wif my life….no whre to go…whats wrong?haiz…that gerl u know who..haiz..i think i will nvr disturb her anymore…haiz…yah i behave like a desprate guy…i hate feeling lonely! i want someone beside me…haiz…ask my frends my everybody out..they all bz wif their life…haiz…so went out alone…went to the park smoking alone…see the scenery….haiz…i really hate feeling alone…haiz….

YEAH!!! SAW THAT LONG GROSS WOUND! hehehe yesterday came back from work all the way help my frend carry his things…yeah quite alot…but its ok nuthing for me….but im so fucking tired! yah that wound bcoz i slip and cut my arm….hahahahah bleed all the way….yeah nuthing for me, not so pain…..but….my heart is pain than my arm….my heart still hurt….

yeah that gerl like nvr layan me…..u know the gerl…..i think she’s bz or what….sms her nvr reply…..nut i called her yesterday at 1800 hrs plus….she said she selling food…nehhhh but its ok for me…..she bz….

just now i chat wif HER…..empty chat only….hahahaha while i chat i feel i miss someone…i dont know who…what to do…try to call my frends….they all bz…bz bz bz everybody bz…yah me too bz! but i hav time……this weekend is so boring…nvr go out….wanna go out wif that GERL but…she’s bz…haiz…tired lah this one lah that one lah…fuck ah! so fuckup! ARH!!!!! so boring……fucking boring damn!!!